number twenty-eight
REAL NAMES'LL BE PROOF
4/20/03. 1:25pm. Home.
SCENE 1. Outside Copley High School gym, early evening, spring 1987. ROSS, a stocky 16-year-old in a wool hat and oversized army jacket -- the front of which is covered with more than 50 pins and buttons, some with humorous slogans, others promoting various rock and punk bands -- locks his late-60s Chevy and begins walking toward the building. VOICE-OVER NARRATION begins. VOICE-OVER continues as ROSS enters the building, walks down the hallway, and arrives at the gym door, ending precisely as ROSS reaches the ticket table inside the door.
| VOICE-OVER NARRATION "For two years in high school, I was the scoreboard operator. I made 12 dollars per game, which I received in a single lump-sum check at the end of each sports season. "As an employee of the Copley High School sports department, I answered to Mr. Falb, the athletic director. Mr. Falb was a good boss, but after working at Copley for something like 800 years, he had gotten a bit absent-minded. Every year or two Mr. Falb got a new scoreboard operator. And every year or two, Mr. Falb had to learn a new name to go with that new kid. "Problem was, I guess somewhere along the line he'd gotten a step behind. So by the time I knew him, Mr. Falb only learned your name about the time the next guy started working for him. I replaced my friend Mark, so Mr. Falb called me 'Mark,' just as Mark had been 'Alan' because that's who he had replaced. "Towards the end of that first year, Mr. Falb finally started to figure it out..." |
SCENE 2. Doorway to the gym. A few fans are already in the bleachers. A friendly-looking man in his late sixties, MR. FALB is stationed by the interior door.
| ROSS "Hi, Mr. Falb." MR. FALB ROSS (smiling) MR. FALB |
MR. FALB realizes his mistake and jokingly rattles off a series of male names, Joe, Bob, Jim, etc., as ROSS walks away laughing. Sound fades out as VOICE-OVER NARRATION begins.
| VOICE-OVER NARRATION "I did the job for another full year. That night was the last time Mr. Falb tried to call me something other than my actual name. True to form, when my friend Andrew took over for me the year after that, Mr. Falb called him 'Ross' for a good long time." |
FADE OUT.
The geek, on the job.
